love and joy

just a loving wish to all for a very merry Christmas. and a few words from my favorite holiday movie, The Bishop's Wife.

'Tonight I want to tell you the story of an empty stocking.

Once upon a midnight clear, there was a child's cry, a blazing star hung over a stable, and wise men came with birthday gifts. We haven't forgotten that night down the centuries. We celebrate it with stars on Christmas trees, with the sound of bells, and with gifts.

But especially with gifts. You give me a book, I give you a tie. Aunt Martha has always wanted an orange squeezer and Uncle Henry can do with a new pipe. For we forget nobody, adult or child. All the stockings are filled, all that is, except one. And we have even forgotten to hang it up. The stocking for the child born in a manger. Its his birthday we're celebrating. Don't let us ever forget that.

Let us ask ourselves what He would wish for most. And then, let each put in his share, loving kindness, warm hearts, and a stretched out hand of tolerance. All the shinning gifts that make peace on earth.'

home sweet home

December has gotten off to a lovely start. my garden is done. twinkle lights shine. and the chilly temperatures have now made the holidays seem rightly placed around the corner. for the next few days - I am housebound from some minor surgery.

but I don't mind. some days away from work. some days to sit and read and nap. some days to be pampered by the hubs. we're watching movies - my head on his shoulder and Chaz's head in my lap. we're talking. planning. dreaming.

joyful. peaceful. grateful.

'love is what makes two people sit in the middle of a bench when there is plenty of room at both ends.'

rut ro

a few weeks ago while wandering through Home Depot, the hubs & I spotted a most wonderful sight. standing tall. twinkling. and ready for a home for the holidays.

oh yes I did.

today is filled with delightful memories of a wonderful Thanksgiving spent with friends. clearing out a store room in anticipation of the upcoming (drumroll please) garage sale. and decorating for Christmas.

'it's the most wonderful time of the year.'

I believe

doctor. explorer. imagineer. the possibilities are endless. how I love watching him grow. too fast. too far away. beautifully.

'let me dream all the time so that not one little piece of living is ever lost.'

sitting pretty

in LA. watching the little (and growing, oh so, big) one. such happy duty. all is right with the world.

will bore you with pictures later.

'It's such a grand thing to be a mother of a mother.'

into place

oh so busy. I think we're all feeling the season. much anticipated. such a hectic part of the year. my to-do list grows. my time dwindles. my ambition soars. my anxiety with it.

but today at Trust Tending, Kristen calms my spirit with her message.

and I wonder whether this word might be one you could use, too: that right where you are is the only place you can be. and just because you're facing challenges or frustrations or exhaustion or grief or rage or any other uncomfortable thing you can name does not diminish the fact that right here ... just exactly where you are ... holds value. and beauty. and feeling a rightness to where I am.

deep breaths please. all in good. due. time.

'falling leaves
hide the path
so quietly'

follow the (yellow) brick road

for the last two weekends the hubs and I (along with beloved boxer, the supervisor) have been working on the front garden. laying a brick path and patio before the new plantings go in. hard, laborious work. sore backs and knees. a lot of teamwork. really a lot of fun. very happy us.

very long overdue as it lay unfinished for months and months and months. now almost checked off the to-do list. step one.

'half the interest of a garden is the constant exercise of the imagination.'

October 16

today is my birthday. and along with the day comes a pumpkin pie. it was always my birthday cake of choice. and the hubs continues the tradition.

it is the very best gift I receive. handmade with love. lucky (hungry) me.

'me oh my. I love pie.'

15 minutes

had a chance to be Hollywood famous this week. got offered a chance to use our home for a scene in an upcoming Lifetime/Warner Bros movie. exciting, huh?

but after several visits and long conversations we are passing on the opportunity. the prospect of having 100 people in the house with heavy equipment. the idea of packing up, storing and then unpacking two rooms of furniture and possessions (and moving in needed props, etc.). the need to kennel the hubs and I and beloved pup for a week. the wear and tear on the old girl (the house and myself). a pending vacation and the hubs being out of town. and that the scene being shot is of a woman destroying her living room with a baseball bat (not a real bat and they're heavily insured. comforting.). all add up to a 'thanks. we're very flattered. but not this time.' answer.

in truth, we are very flattered. honored. proud. we love to show off our historic home. and that other people can appreciate it is an honor indeed. and what fun it would be - she thinks, cautiously.

two additional phone calls with pleas to change our mind. they love the house. please. please. please. my head and heart fill with pride and temptation. but we're standing firm this time. too many cons outweigh the pros. but thanks again.

the final call ended with the hope that we might be available in the future. a Brad Pitt movie is in the works. hmmm ... have your people call my people.

'everyone's a star and deserves the right to twinkle.'

b.i.g.

I'm gearing-up-for and smack-dab-in-the-middle-of a doozey of a fall season. special projects at work. special events to host. taking on some new challenges. big. big. big. I mean really big. and, in the meantime, pondering a life-changing course. did I mention big? and to add to the calendar, darling daughter called last night to see if we could come out to babysit over Halloween. happily accepted. heart-filling big.

it's all good. but ever so busy. fun. in a not-really-stressful, but anxious kind of way.

I love life when it is full. happy. quirky. uncertain. challenging. and I float along joyfully. there are those moments, like yesterday, when I hear the little ping of a bubble burst. I can say that I can handle it (through tears of joy or sorrow or plain old frustration) - in all honesty - not because I am strong. but because the people that surround me. lift me up, support me. there is love. faith. grace. gratitude. hope. wonderfully big.

'real and lasting change is possible where it can do the most good, inside our own hearts and minds. It’s either fear or love, baby. I choose love.'

on the ottoman

here's what I'm reading today. can't hardly wait.

'a blessed companion is a book, - a book that, fitly chosen, is a lifelong friend,... a book that, at a touch, pours its heart into our own.'

Friday morning

this morning I am

- enjoying the pumpkin explosion in my house
- whittling away my to-do list
- listening to music cranked up on the iPod & dancing inside my head
- cruising the web & finding things that make me smile like this ...

(image courtesy Josh & Main)

so much to do

making a list this morning. not my usual million items on separate pieces of paper. one big master plan list. with dates. and duties. and (oh so much) drama.

I am so (as in sooooooo) far behind (as in months) with my things to do. it is embarrassing. really. truly.

so I'm off to a meeting (on my list). then another meeting (on my list). then I am hunkering down to do some crossing off.

go!

'the vision must be followed by the venture. it is not enough to stare up the steps -we must step up the stairs.'

happy valentines day

the hubs just returned from a few (oy. ten.) days away. I am so glad he is home. he brings me small things from his travels. and I love the gifts, but the stories that surround them are more magical.

August 23 was Qixi. Valentines Day. the seventh day of the seventh lunar month. it surrounds the tale of an emperor who fell in love with a fairy. their love was forbidden but a goddess took pity on the couple and allowed them to reunite once a year.

this is a Qixi box. it should contain small celebration cakes (like fruit cake) - but their shelf life is a mere 3 hours so a 22 hours flight is not too conducive. he tells me as he was about to abandon the mission to bring me these lovely cakes, the concergiere asked if he would like the box they come it. and knowing how I love all things blue and white - he said yes. and so he hand-carried this beautiful box - filled with these tiny boxes - home.

he is very romantic.

I am reminded on a daily basis why I love him so.

'I've fallen in love many times... always with you.'

Louie-ville

we've had a bit of rain and it must have been a wake up call. what a wonderful world.

'for myself I hold no preferences among flowers, so long as they are wild, free, spontaneous.'

my guy

we sat. together. relaxed. and watched the others play horseshoes.

'to sit on a hillside on a glorious afternoon is to be back in Eden, where doing nothing was not boring - it was peace.'

giving thanks

(courtesy of More Design Please)

'amen.'

this is what one looks like

happy birthday, darlin'!

'hey, I've got nothing to do today but smile.'

promises to keep

my heart has a bit of an ache in it today. I am missing my friends. some far away. some closer by. some right around the corner and even next door.

with the start of (oh my) August time is picking up pace. speeding by. not looking back. and definately not waiting for me. so I must make it wait. or at least take advantage of every moment it has to offer. yes, please.

tonight will be a good start. the usual suspects. the gaggle. the gang. the peeps. we're going out to dinner. and that is a good way to start the month that ends summer.

and August holds more in store. a first birthday celebration for the grandbaby. a trip to sunny CA to visit. a bunch of unfinished projects finally getting off the ground (stalled by my own procrastination). a bunch of new adventures. and a promise to call. invite. attend. enjoy your company. see you soon. yes, promise.

'piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind, "Pooh?" he whispered.
"Yes, Piglet?"
"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's hand.
"I just wanted to be sure of you." '

hello

I was very hesitant to get a smart phone. an Iphone. like my Ipad it's a bit IntImIdatIng. but as I get use to it/them. I find the convenience and apps quite enjoyable.

then came the hard part. finding a phone case that I liked. I searched. and looked. and pondered. until that bright shiney day when i love life introduced her phone covers. tah-dah! eureka! voila! done!

and the best thing about my case is that when I am tempted to lash out or respond too quickly to a message or conversation. I literally hold the answer in my hand.

'sometimes when I'm angry I have the right to be angry, but that doesn't give me the right to be cruel.'

life in the deep end

swimming through sunshine. that's how I am feeling. and doesn't it conjur up a lovely picture?

'my crown is called content.'

news flash

here is my bit of news.
I have a job!

here is my office.

here is my reaction.
yippee!

'if you have a garden and a library, you have everything you need.'

hello July

a lot is happening in my life. good. crazy. stressful. scarey. happy. blessed. I am embarking on a bit of new career (details coming soon). I am hesitant and sad to leave work and people and things behind until I realize that I am simply putting that work and people and things into a different context. I am excited about what is about to be.

I always thought that as I got older my life would be calmer. but it just seems to go through one wonderfully hectic stage to another. I can try to find peace in it all. even if that peace is punctuated with agnst. worry. giddiness. anticipation. I think it is the plain ol' joy in just being busy. experiencing new things. taking solice in the present. embracing the madness. thanking Him for the love that surrounds me. staying close. asking for patience (please). accepting the challenge. making plans. taking it one day at a time. one step at a time. looking back. not regretting. choosing love not fear.

'I have finally realized that balance is futile. life is just too lopsided to be balanceable.'

happiness is

tgif.
t.g.i.f.

I'm so very glad it's Friday. so very glad the hubs is coming back into town today. so very glad I have such good friends that send me nice notes. so very glad that I can make a difference sometimes. so very glad I have opportunities. so very glad I have a choice. so very glad I have a husband and friends and family that support my wacky schemes and untamed nature unequivocally. so very glad I have a smattering of brain cells left in my head after this week. so very glad I can try to be strong while really being unsure. so very glad my faith carries me. so very glad for so many things.

'the Lord loveth a cheerful giver. He also accepteth from a grouch.'

one thing I'd like to believe

A pooching tummy is put in place so that you will have a soft lap on which your grandchildren can sit as you read them Where the Red Fern Grows and Little Women every time they come to your house. They will develop a love of literature because their early memories of reading will involve comfort.

(quote courtesy of The Pioneer Woman)

'I am pushing sixty. that is enough exercise for me.'

I do

truly. madly. deeply.

















(image courtesy of [i love life])

support the cause here.

'open your heart and take us in.'

there and here

left on a jet plane. arrived to smiling faces. almost walking babies. laughter so contagious. was smitten. shopped. ate. antiqued. got sunburned. spent time. was exhausted. exhilerated.

came home so very late. or early. slept hard. emptied suitcases. made appointments. got disappointing news. then hopeful news. had an unexpected phone call. and a long conversation. did laundry. made dinner.

life is so very (fill in the blank). happy. tiring. lonely. lovely. confusing. simple. complicated. joyful. draining. filling. full.

'the kaleidoscope of colour which is my life, shows the interesting choices I've made along the way.'

today

glad for a Tuesday after a tumultuous Monday.
glad for a week promising rain.
glad for a little jaunt to the sunshine state.
glad to be spending a lot of time with the hubs.
glad to see almost all my babies (and terribly missing one working in Atlanta).
glad to arrive to this precious face ...















'don't worry. be happy.'

memorial day

(Wagoners Chapel at Shoals, Indiana)

every day I think of those that are now missing from my life. family and friends. the memories make me laugh and cry. jump for joy. be humbled in appreciation. count the blessings in my life.

to those folks shaped me. taught me. loved me. to those I knew that kept me safe and especially to those I've never met.

thank you. I love you. always.

'peace to each soul that sleeps; rest to each faithful eye that weeps.'

let me count the ways

today I am celebrating 12,411 days of marriage. give or take. yesterday amidst baseball games and bike races the hubs and I enjoyed our 34th wedding anniversary.

12,411 days that included smiles. laughter. more tears of joy than sorrow. births. deaths. trama. triumph. patience. tolerance. loss. talking. listening. forgiveness. forgetfulness. frustration. selfishness. sharing. faith. grace. giving. saying 'I'm sorry'. hand holding. hugs. kisses. kisses. kisses. travel. beautiful children. a precious grandchild. homes here and abroad. seeing the world through each other. finding beauty in every glance. waiting. hoping. dreaming. being so content. counting blessings. blessings. blessings. coming home to each other. being there for each other. making each other happy (most) every single day. so much love. unending. enduring.

'our wedding was many years ago. the celebration continues to this day.'

outlook

I fell asleep last night to the sound of gentle rain and distant thunder.

this morning the rain continues. it is a perfect day to sit inside. watch. listen. it is soothing. comforting. somehow, a bit lonely. all in all beautiful.

'anyone who says sunshine brings happiness has never danced in the rain.'

post it note

(image courtesty of black tangled heart)

'in the end, only kindness matters.'

how now

May has not come in like a lamb. my to-do lists are a mile long. my goals lofty. my energy at times abundant. so why do I sit idly by? I cannot decide where to go first. how to start. what direction to turn.

my blog posts are equally disjointed. I have several drafts at the moment. but none are exactly what I want to say. I twist and turn. my emotions run hot. my words run out. but not my thoughts. my head is full of chatter. images and ideas float and swim and race. and I struggle as how to jot them down on virtual paper.

perhaps it is the lure of spring. the approach of summer. I feel somehow caught in a constant whirl unable to break free. I sit and ponder and wait in the eye of the proverbial storm. when I want to get up and work and do.

how do you choose. motivate. percolate. thrive.

'now I know, a refuge never grows from a chin in the hand and a thoughtful pose. gotta tend the earth if you want a rose.'

baby baby

yesterday I returned from a visit to Ohio to see my sweet sister P and attend my niece's baby shower. good timing.

today I am very happy to officially welcome her into the grandmother club. sweet P joined our blessed group mid-morning with the arrival of a beautiful baby boy, 7 pounds 1 ounce. joy full.

'a house needs a grandma in it.'

a bit of correspondence

June 19, 1937

Dear Cedric,

A strange thing happened to me today. I saw a big thundercloud move down over Half Dome, and it was so big and clear and brilliant that it made me see many things that were drifting around inside of me; things that related to those who are loved and those who are real friends.

For the first time I know what love is; what friends are; and what art should be.

Love is a seeking for a way of life; the way that cannot be followed alone; the resonance of all spiritual and physical things. Children are not only of flesh and blood — children may be ideas, thoughts, emotions. The person of the one who is loved is a form composed of a myriad mirrors reflecting and illuminating the powers and thoughts and the emotions that are within you, and flashing another kind of light from within. No words or deeds may encompass it.

Friendship is another form of love — more passive perhaps, but full of the transmitting and acceptance of things like thunderclouds and grass and the clean granite of reality.

Art is both love and friendship, and understanding; the desire to give. It is not charity, which is the giving of Things, it is more than kindness which is the giving of self. It is both the taking and giving of beauty, the turning out to the light the inner folds of the awareness of the spirit. It is the recreation on another plane of the realities of the world; the tragic and wonderful realities of earth and men, and of all the inter-relations of these.

I wish the thundercloud had moved up over Tahoe and let loose on you; I could wish you nothing finer.

Ansel

(source: letters of note)

to me the beauty of the blogging world is how it opens my eyes to a vast array of amazing things. words. thoughts. I continue to be amazed by how much there is to learn. feel. share.

'letters mingle souls.'

rally cap

I came across this quote today by Jack Layton.

'so let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic.
and we'll change the world.'

just wanted to share.

perfect storm

we went to the ballgame yesterday afternoon.

(here two of my favorite guys striking a pose. I love them both very very much).












we watched under lovely overcast skies (but not a drop fell).

we cheered for the visitors (which was a hard decision - we are local fans, but not entirely when the farm team of the beloved Cubbies are the opponents) as they gave a valiant but futile effort in 13 innings.

we drank beer.











we caught a ball.











we love this game.

'don't tell me about the world. not today. it's springtime and they're knocking baseball around fields where the grass is damp and green in the morning.'

April showers

watching the weather today. the skies are turning from white to grey and back again. the rare patch of blue peeking through. the occasional sunbeam makes an appearance. the windows are open and the breezes blow in making the curtains in my little room dance. flutter. float. waves of far-off music and blooming jasmine drift in.

the sights and sounds and smells of rain approaching. calming. anxious. hypnotizing.

'there's always a period of curious fear between the first sweet-smelling breeze and the time when the rain comes cracking down.'

lucky me

trying out a new look today. on several counts.

a new spring time look for my blog.

a new curly look for my hair.

a pick-myself-up dust-myself-off start-again look for my attitude.

'I've got dreams in hidden places and extra smiles for when I'm blue.'

play it again

a friend in need is a friend indeed. today I have been neither. and I am feeling pretty crappy about it. I want to help. but I cannot. I must not.

too hard to explain. too difficult to understand. but the truth is nothing could be further from the truth. it is not complicated. it is simple. basic.

fear is rearing its ugly head. making demands. clouding judgement. promoting hatred. promising hurt.

does anyone listen? believe that you can choose? it's either fear or love baby. I choose love.

why don't you?

'I love you without knowing how, or when or from where. I love you straightforwardly. without complexities or pride. so I love you because I know no other way than this.'

zoom

got back from LA late last night (early this morning). had such a lovely time. talked long. ate well. drank deeply. witnessed life. shared love. oh the joy of being together. where life definitely does not stand still - but lingers beautifully.

today I feel like the doors of my little world are thrown open wide. perhaps it is simply being refreshed after my weekend. deep down I am feeling the massive rumblings. hope. well-being. purpose. I cherish what has lead me here. I am moving in the right direction. I am asking for strength. I am motivated. enthusiastic. ever so ready to go!

there is so much to look forward to. I am asking you to come with me.

'pick up the pen, the needle, the dish, the fabric, the gardening shovel. move to the rhythm of that thing that makes your heart come alive.'

hop hop

friday the hubs and I are taking a quick trip to see the kiddos and grandbaby. just a long weekend. just a few hugs and kisses. just about the greatest way to spend a little part of a big part of my life.

so today I am off running errands. getting a little something for Easter baskets. getting a pedicure. getting so excited I can hardly contain myself.

'people ask why I skip and I give the incomparable reason of "why not?" '

yesterday

spent the day in my little room. reading. dozing. puttering. eating. chillaxing (something happy in that word).

my views included ...

my dog Chaz. for protection.


















my book (The Paris Wife) and slice of cherry goodness. for comfort.














my view. for joy.














'I slip from workaholic to bum real easy.'

this is how we bloom

(image courtesy Chatting at the Sky)

such a lovely post.

'we can learn much when we open wide our eyes, close our fast-moving lips and tuck our hair behind our ears to listen.'

tgif

I have never been more happy for it to be Friday. my crazy busy week is over. the sky is clear. the air is brisk. the birds are singing. I am being ever so lazy.

(now to my credit I did get the car inspected on my way to get lattes at Starbucks.)

my house is somewhat of a wreck after hosting a club meeting mid-week. my bed remains unmade. dinner will be take-out. but I am happy and content to take the day and do mostly nothing.

this afternoon I sat in the sun and finished my book. a lovely novella entitled The Uncommon Reader. a story of Queen Elizabeth discovering a love of reading. no drama. no violence. no sex. simple. enticing. one of those books that while you know it is fiction it seems very real. and after wondering for years, this week as I watched the Queen celebrate her diamond jubilee, I know she carries a book in her ever present handbag.

'reading was not doing, that had always been the trouble. and old though she was, she was still a doer.'

oh how happy

nothing does a person so much good as to spend a few days with friends. and this past weekend I was done in. the girls and I took our annual trip to Round Top to Festival Hill Herbal Forum. the Forum was a bit lacking. but the company divine.

we stayed here. a charming little house. filled with the reclaimed. the vintage. the antique.














we shopped here. a plant sale of plant sales. hosted by the local Master Gardener group. filled with the flowering. the aromatic. the succulant.














we talked. we ate. we drank. we were silly. serious. downright sensational.

'I have friends in overalls whose friendship I would not swap for the favor of the kings of the world.'

design inspiration

(image courtesy of More Design Please)

I love these staghorn ferns. the material. the arrangement. the composition.

green. architectural. organic. creative. simply beautiful.

'design is an opportunity to continue telling the story, not just to sum everything up.'

a rose is a rose

my girlfriends and I are about to take a trip. we carpool in the biggest car. pack our picnic baskets with goodies. visit the ATM. and set off to Festival Hill in Round Top for their annual Herbal Forum.

we are giddy with excitment. to spend the time together. to be amongst fellow gardeners. to surround ourselves with plants. to learn. to listen. to eat. drink. and be merry. to sit. and chat. and chat some more.

'each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive.'

color my world

I took a little day trip this week. ventured south looking for inspiration for my front garden project.

living in the great state definitely has it's advantages. spring has sprung (well, that is to say it HAD, for today is cold, rainy and blustery. but as my mama would say 'chilly today, hot tamale!'). the drab colors of winter have burst into a most colorful palate.

it was a delightful day. the sun on my face. the gentle wind at my back. and before me glorious plants just waiting for a good home.

a good time was had by all.




















'take thy plastic spade, it is thy pencil; take thy seeds, thy plants, they are thy colours.'

how do I love thee

yesterday the hubs and I went a bit north. on a bus trip with our local heritage society. to Waco. you might think this an odd choice for a field trip. believe you me, I certainly did. but, it turns out, this city is a wealth of history. and beauty.

my favorite stop was a visit to the Armstrong Browning Library on the Baylor campus. in this unassuming structure is housed the largest collection of work by Robert and Elizabeth Barrett Browning. a testament to their talent. and their love. the building is adorned with 62 stained glass windows. most depicting scenes from their lyric poetry. many contain the image of a pomegranate - a symbol of love. there are mementos from their lives. congenial ornately hand-written letters from colleagues (including Charles Dickens). volumes of books. artwork-lined hallways. magnificent furniture from the Browning's own home. all totally accessible to the student population and the general public. treasures enough to fill the minds and hearts of generations.

all in all. a lovely day. oh let me count the ways. filled with discovery. and laughter. and friendship.

(an interesting point of conversation as we admired the letters was that the sad legacy of today's authors will be machine-printed emails and electronic kindle snapshots. perhaps equally brilliant in their work - but sorely lacking in their presentation.)

'my letters! all dead paper, mute and white! and yet they seem alive and quivering against my tremulous hands.'

green and growing

(image courtesy pinterest)

'every thought is a seed.'

full house

we were surprised this week by a visit from our son and his girlfriend. they had a break in their work schedules and asked if they could come visit. the word 'yes' was immediate and enthusiastic.

the girlfriend has never been to the great state. and, like I was when the hubs told me we had the opportunity to move to Texas, her thoughts are of cowboys, tumbleweed and cactus. this CA girl (originally from NC) wants to see the hometown side. not the touristy bit. so we're going to see a few 'haunts' today. and tonight they will mosey into the big city to visit friends and experience the night life (and leaving momma at home, whew!).

I love seeing my children as adults. the way they live their lives. what they've become. made of themselves. shape their existence. their relationships. they are happy. caring. life-loving. adventurous. handsome. beautiful. witty. funny. sincere. dedicated. respectful. independent. from a mother's heart, simply adorable.

'there are no seven wonders of the world in the eyes of a child. there are seven million.'

waking moments

my bedside table. not a table really. it's a stack of sewing boxes on top of a low chest. sometimes a bit dusty. not cluttered. just holds the essentials.


a lamp. the book of the moment. a picture of me and my mom. and a little heart-shaped rock.



things that make me smile. keep me focused. fill me up.

everyday.

but, somehow, especially on this day of love.

'what I need to live has been given to me by the earth. why I need to live has been given to me by you.'

l.o.v.e.

last night the hubs and I along with some dear friends went to see Natalie Cole. the evening was delightful. the company divine. and the music, well, unforgettable.














'music is an outburst of the soul.'

a new attitude

my phone remains by my side. a box of kleenx at the ready. trying out. on. another perspective.

'laugh when you can. apologize when you should. and let go of what you cannot change.'

funky town

I'd like a do-over please. let's start Tuesday again. from the top. yesterday I had this odd inkling. foreboding. not-so-good things lurking. I was crabby. now gone from bad to worse. today I am just funked-out.

got an email notifying me that I did not get a job that I dearly wanted.
got an email of a meeting where the speaker was wrongly identified (and it was my job to do the telling. screwed up there royally.)
the fire department and ambulance is at the neighbors. worrisome to say the least.
did something screwy to my back carrying in the ladder to do some painting. now sitting on the sofa with drugs and an ice pack.
waiting for a phone call that won't come. no matter how long and where I carry my phone with me.

and I can think of a thousand other things to feel sorry for (it's easy to continue in that downward spiral once it begins). join me in my pity party. get down in funky town. I'll take you there. misery loves company.

whew.

or I can pick myself up. brush myself off. and start all over again. adopt the mantra of this too shall pass. I look up and see the sun is shining. my life is blessed. and the drugs will soon kick in. I'll slowly sip from the half-full glass for the rest of the day.

ps. I finished this rant and I thought 'stop whining'. my friend R would call the waah-mbulance! but as I went to delete the post I thought no. I'll leave it here. a gentle in-your-face reminder. not all days are good. not all days are bad. and it helps to talk. to think out loud. it helps to read other posts and know that we all twist and turn. up and down. side to side. sometimes it just feels right to be miserable. sometimes it's just feels good to scream. pout. cry. stomp around. and it's comforting to know someone is listening.

'toss your dashed hopes not into a trash bin but into a drawer where you are likely to rummage some bright morning.'

love letter

I have an unknown friend. wise. witty. her blog is endearing. her insight relevant. her words timely. I cherish her. she taught me - teaches me - to choose. it's fear or love baby.

she wrote religiously for months. and lately her posts are few and far between. but no less poignant. and always welcome. so today when I saw her in my inbox a little anticipatory sigh escaped me. and I eagerly opened her letter.

friendship comes from all directions. from unexpected places. in all shapes and sizes. word and deed. thought. kindness. comfort. compassion. grace. the love is huge.

'here's to good women. may we know them. may we be them. may we raise them.'

much ado about everything

there is much activity at magnolia's end. post remodeling projects add to the to-do list. a little shopping to fill in the blanks of decorating. all on a bit of a deadline (planning for a March club meeting and date tbd house-warming party). fun stuff. I work best under (fortunately light) pressure. birthdays to plan. babies to watch. a bevy of committee and commission duties. and still on the job hunt.

there is much activity in the neighborhood. an unexpected hospital stay. a joyful retirement in process. friends to gather. hands to hold. blessings to count.

there is much activity all around. looking for the happy. oh so tired of the bitter talk. searching. wanting. needing. finding. hope and love and courage and wisdom in the smallest circles. at times (and when allowed) far over shadowed by the angst. well worth the discovery because when realized it lights up the sky.

there is much activity inside me. swirling in thougths. pounding in hearts. tapping of feet. anxious. at ease. breathing deeply. exhaling slowly. taking one day at a time. remembering the past. enjoying. muddle-throughing. delighting in. every today. looking forward to the future.

there is a meditation that recites Psalm 46:10. I take comfort in the verse. and greater comfort in the repetition.

'be still and know that I am.
be still and know.
be still.
be.'

in like a lion

March is shaping up quite nicely. never fear February ... I promise to fill you with fun and exciting adventures. but unexpectedly and quite joyfully, the month (which already lets us all be Irish) is already booked with a trio of diverse activities. and it's only January.

March 3
a bus trip to Waco. now you may say why Waco. and, believe you me, I asked the very same question of this town which was our introduction to Texas. allow me to digress. before the family moved the hubs came down to the great state. he drove. and as he passed through Waco he called me. 'there is a huge fire. I can see it on the horizon.' you may know where this is leading - the Branch Davidians complex was under siege. 'dearest,' I said, trying to stay calm. 'Please drive faster.' so that is always what comes to mind when I hear Waco. but in reality, it is a lovely city. home to Baylor University. history. parks and recreation. the bus trip will offer historic home tours. a tour of the Armstrong Browning Library. Cameron Park & Gardens. a dp float at the Dr. Pepper Museum. and refreshments along the way on a bus full of friends. delightful.

March 17
the 17th annual Herbal Forum at Festival Hill at Round Top. you have read of my gardening gals adventures a time or two on this site. let the fun begin again. the topic of this gathering is roses (yes, they are herbs too!). we are renting a little house nearby. just the girls. eating. shopping. and learning. together.

March 26 & 27
camp Georgetown. a two day session that brings experts in local historic preservation from around the country for intensive and high-energy (I quote the brochure) training. boring you say. not at all I respond. this is my cup of tea.

between now and then there is plenty to do. places to go. people to see. but it is oh so exciting to fill in the boxes on my calendar.

'and in today already walks tomorrow.'

ps

following my gardening day is my house cleaning day. the weather is chilly and rain is on it's way (correction. now pouring.). and as I take a break. check my emails. messages. new posts. this one made my heart leap.

please put it on your list.

'you are loved. So be the loved.'

(quote courtesy Chatting at the Sky)

during

it is a beautiful day in the great state. and I am one tired gal. but an oh so happy tired.

been working in the garden today. on that front bed that I wrote about here. over the past two Saturdays we've had a small crew here doing the really hard (ie not so fun) work. but now it is my turn to dig in. so I went to work removing a portion of a brick border that outlines the beds. hard work. yes (my hands ache. I can hardly raise my arms. goodness, I am so out of gardening shape). rewarding. absolutely. happy. positively.

next we'll be putting in the base for the brick walk. and amending the soil. then once the chance of frost has passed, the joyful planting. can't hardly wait for March.

'I have never had so many good ideas day after day as when I worked in the garden.'

good morning

the weather has been unpredictable here in the great state. but there is beauty in that. and one little poppy at my curbside gate thinks it's time to shine. bloom. glow.

how glorious.

'the flowers of late winter and early spring occupy places in our hearts well out of proportion to their size.'

please & thank you

the rule in my house is that appliances are acceptable as gifts (birthday, Christmas, Valentine's Day, et al) only when requested. and during the 2011 holiday exchange I received two much wanted and asked for items.

a dust buster. in all honesty, I didn't even know if they still made dustbusters. but to my delight the hubs placed one perfectly wrapped under the tree. I was thrilled. and I use it every day. with much gratitude.

a blender. I have had several blenders in my lifetime. but never one that would actually do a satisfactory job. during my stay while darling daughter was on bedrest we made smoothies. so I asked her for a blender like that. and voila! delivered.

now I have plenty of dust to bust. bunnies. crumbs. and the like. but I have yet to break out the blender. until tomorrow. when I will try this delicious concoction found on whoorlie. green is not my favorite color for a drink. but the ingredients and her raving reviews make it ever so tempting.

looking forward to the taste test. will keep you posted.

'life is trying things to see if they work.'

seconds

(image courtesy Joss & Main)

feeling a little fiesty (thus two posts - and maybe more - in one day). but ever so polite.

'what you allow, you encourage.'

worth mentioning

isn't it beautiful how we can make each other happy. this crazy world of unknown people sharing personal life altering moments. simple. wholesome. poignant.

that is what I found this morning as I read Cause & Effect at Confessions of a Pioneer Woman. Ree Drummond's (honest. witty. entertaining. exuberant. funny. heartfelt. Kleenex at the ready for tears of joy and sorrow) account of her life. adventures of a mom. wife. cook. woman.

it just made me smile. and say thanks. and take a deep breath and exhale. and say life is good. really. so very good.

'if you smile when no one else is around, you really mean it.'

the beat goes on

looking for a little inspiration today. from friends. from family. but mostly from inside myself. my to-do list has shrunk a bit, those easily attainable, achieveable things crossed off. but I should add motivation to my agenda. it is sorely lacking.

I am hurting a bit. some a self pity party. some for a friend. some for a family member. I have been talking to Him quite a bit these days. sorting through. weeding out. seeking. searching. asking. thanking. I get still. and think. and know. and wait. for good things to come. but I know that I cannot simply ask and receive. patience and focus and grace is the answer for me. but alas I am impatient. and unfocused. and all for saving grace. so I continue. one day to another. and wish. and hope. and pray. for guidance. for wisdom. for clarity.

I have a meeting tonight that I hope will give me some of those things. directly. indirectly. a meeting of creative minds. artists. doers. believers. the power of positive thinkers. I want that song stuck in my head.

'God respects me when I work; but God loves me when I sing.'

before

while I wait for my chalkboard paint to dry, another project is taking place at magnolia's end. my garden is undergoing a transformation. I hired a yard guy do the back-breaking work. tear out all the old tired plantings. unearth roots from long ago shrubs and never ending tendrils of spotty ground cover. expand the beds. repurpose old concrete walks.

and then. then. then. I can plant. play. play. play.

I am giddy with excitment!

yes. downright giddy.

my front garden is plain and uninviting. oh so boring and bland. no compliment whatsoever to the house. and they are long overdue to sing in harmony. beds brimming with (climate appropriate) cottage style. brick and stone paths. a little place to sit and chat and wine.

the planning. the purchase. the planting. every step delightful.














'anticipation is making me wait.'

in progress

it's project day around my house. and checking off my to-do list is my chalkboard wall. just finished the first coat and I am totally in love with the way it looks. but as with all good things (that come to those who wait) I must endure three days before I can write my first word.

but patience is a virture. and going from this ...












to this ...


















is very exciting.

'poured a cup of hot sepia coffee in a wisteria flowered mug, dandelion sunshine spilling through the periwinkle sky.'

I believe

(image courtesy kelly rae roberts)

it's been a bit of a trying day. not stressful. but cause for self-control. self-respect. faith.

so I will.

'there's a crack in everything. that's how the light gets in.'